So many women have evolved to think any nice thing a man does is good. They feel they should be grateful for any kind gesture or sign of affection. And while a truly good man will definitely show kindness and affection, sometimes guys with ulterior motives show them too, and that can be really confusing.
There are 7 things that some men may do often that may seem quite sweet and endearing but are actually signs that something’s amiss in the way they see the relationship.
7 Ways in Which a Guy Acting Sweet Might not Actually Be a Good Thing
- When he keeps in touch with you constantly
Keeping in touch can be good, but when it gets out of hand, it can take over your life. You don’t want to be spending every waking moment on your phone or talking to your guy. Lots of moments? Yes. All moments?
No. That’s the sign of a clingy guy or one who is up to no good when away and doesn’t want you to find out. The worst is if he tries to make you feel guilty for not being happy about this.
- When he always volunteers to run out or run errands for you
Worried he could be cheating? This may be a sign. It can be difficult for guys who are cheating to find time to text or call their side dishes, so if he’s always up for a run to the gas station or post office, you might be slightly suspicious. It seems nice on the outside, but it could be just a way to get out of the house. He might even be visiting her.
- When he shows you huge, outward signs of affection
This is not always a good thing. It doesn’t necessarily mean your guy is doing anything wrong, but if you don’t like it, then he should know you better. If he’s sky writing your name or trying to make out with you when you’re sitting on a park bench, that simply might not be what you’re into. Similarly, that PDA? That can make a lot of women truly uncomfortable. Even though it seems sweet, it might not be your thing.
- When he gets frustrated if he doesn’t hear from you
This one’s real bad. If he gets upset because he hasn’t heard from you in days, okay, we get it. But if he wants you at his beck and call all the time, that’s no good. Seemingly, this is just a nice way that he shows his affection, but truly, it’s not nice. You’re your own woman, and you have things to do! You don’t have to be in constant contact.
- When he tells you what’s good for you
If he’s pulling Snickers bars out of your lunch box for work and trashing them or telling you that you should start waking up earlier, he might be doing it under the guise of “caring.” But generally speaking, that’s not the way real caring goes. This one especially comes into play when you’re having fights. If you say your opinion, and he says “sweetie, you know you always …” whatever … that’s not a caring partner. That’s manipulative.
- When he tells you “not to worry about it”
Again, you are your own woman, and you have opinions and concerns and questions just like anyone else. If you confront him about something (even if it’s something small), don’t let him tell you “not to worry about it.” This is a belittling tactic that men are capable of using to appear strong and caring. Yet the way it makes us feel as women is definitely not good. Besides, you can worry about it if you want to!
Sweetness Is Hard to See Sometimes
Keep in mind that some of these are walking a fine line, and you may actually appreciate them and be totally fine with these gestures.
This is of course your prerogative, and in many ways, there are examples of the above list that can genuinely be kind gestures. For example, if you two are in love and he asks you to marry him with a baseball game billboard sign announcement, if you love him and want to marry him … that’s great! It’s awesome, in fact.
Or if you’re a particularly social person and you’re used to having boyfriends who don’t text or call all day, a guy who keeps in touch with regularity is a gem for you.
What we’re talking about when we say “signs of trouble” are situations in which you feel like you should be grateful and happy and loving when your guy does something … but you’re actually annoyed, creeped out or sort of upset by it.
It’s important to have an even and centered relationship with your boyfriend, partner or husband—one that makes you feel comfortable, loved and happy, and one where, if you don’t feel those things for some reason, open discussions are welcomed and resolvable.