If you take someone for granted, you don’t deserve them. Be mature enough to let them move on to someone else who knows their worth. ~Gia
All of those who feel that they have been taken for granted in their relationships, raise your hands. Yes, I see a sea of hands in the air (well, not really but I know I would if you were all within eyesight!). Being taken for granted is one of the biggest complaints that people have in their personal relationships, whether they be with family members, romantic partners, spouses, children, colleagues, bosses, and so on. I’ve already offered my views on imbalances in relationships which you can find by clicking here but I would like to discuss the issue of being taken for granted, specifically.
We all know that all relationships are about give and take, right? Well, have you thought much about whether you are a giver or a taker, or do you think that you strike a good balance between the two? How you perceive yourself may be one thing but the way that others perceive you may be another. A good way to evaluate where you lie on the give/take spectrum is to think back on how others respond to you in your relationships.
Do you feel as though you are being used and taken for granted in a lot of your relationships? If so, you are probably too much of a giver. You need to sit down and really think about why it is that you are the go-to person in everyone’s life. Relationships are not about keeping score, but giving way too much of yourself without receiving enough of a shoulder to lean on when you need it, can leave you feeling tired, worn out, depressed, used, and other such negative feelings. Being supportive of the people you care about is wonderful. We all need to know when to say “no”, though. Are you saying “no” to others and “yes” to yourself enough? If not, you need to start taking care of yourself as much as you are taking care of others.
On the other side of the spectrum, do you find that there have been many times in which others have called you selfish, self-centered, or have been accused of being a user? You may have found yourself offended by the audacity these people have had to utter such accusations about you, but it might be time for a reality check. If you’re depending way too much on others for support or help, or taking advantage of the kindness that the people in your life are offering you, you are most likely a taker. It is also very likely that you are taking those who love you for granted. A reality check here is incredibly important because although it may feel good to lay back and let others take care of you, they probably will not do so for long. Remember that everyone has their limits. The truth is that when you take loved ones for granted, take advantage of them, or not pay them the attention they deserve, you don’t deserve them. And why would you when there are so many others out there who would be happy to treat those you take for granted like gold? If you think that there are no other options for them, you could not be more wrong. There is always going to be someone who will take great care of the person that you failed to take care of.
At the end of the day, we all just want to feel respected, appreciated, and loved. When one person in a relationship starts taking the other person for granted, it creates an imbalance. If both start taking each other for granted, it’s a recipe for disaster. Again, relationships are about give and take and the most successful ones strike a balance between the two, without exception. ~Gia