The Secret To Irresistible, Enticing Confidence
by James Bauer
Do you want to have more confidence in your life? Do you want to feel solid and fearless in everything you do, including relationships?
This is a great article by James Bauer, relationship expert. He truly understands confidence and reveals how you can easily develop it with just this one simple technique. If you’ve ever imagined yourself fearless and fabulous both in life and in your relationships, read on!
Would you like to have real self-confidence? I’m talking about the kind of confidence that is rooted so deep it is literally unshakable. I’m talking about the kind of confidence you see in a mother when she needs to protect her infant. There’s no self-doubt or bashfulness. Her actions flow from a place of certainty. Emotions may be present, but they do not run the show. Her mind remains resolutely focused on the goal. You can’t pull rank on her and she doesn’t care how big you are or what kind of car you drive.
What if you could have that kind of confidence when you approach the dating scene? Not the fierce part, but the confident, secure part. That kind of confidence comes from knowing with certainty what you want. That kind of certainty comes from having a solid plan and no hesitation to take action when you see the openings you know to look for.
Wouldn’t it feel great? Wouldn’t you love to have an unshakable sense of purpose, identity and direction when it comes to meeting and interacting with men? I’d like you to have that confidence and I have a few tips to move you in that direction.
Always start with you.
If you are absolutely sure of what you want, you won’t feel nervous about making relationship decisions. The more certain you become about what you want in a relationship and a man, the more confidence you will feel about setting boundaries, asking for what you want, or pursuing someone who might or might not reciprocate your interest.
Letting go of fear becomes easier when you accept “failure” as a valuable strategy. Dorothea Brande has been quoted for her famous statement on the best method to achieve success, “Act as though it is impossible to fail.” Combine this with the wisdom of T.J. Watson, Jr., the former president of IBM. “Would you like the formula for success?” Watson asks. “Double your rate of failure.”
How can you succeed by failing more often? Many successful people swear by this method. If you are always cautious and terrified of mistakes, you don’t try much and you don’t learn much. People who are willing to fail embrace it and lose their fear of taking action in the process.
When it comes to dating…you will fail some of the time. The only way to be highly confident when dating is to accept failure as a part of the dating process. Don’t think of setbacks and letdowns as something terrible that needs to be controlled at all costs. Instead, embrace failure as something natural that is “okay.” Embracing this simple shift in your belief system can dramatically increase your confidence.