He Doesn’t Say “I love you”
I was in a 20 year marriage which was abusive(mainly verbal and emotional). My divorce was final January 2013 and he was out of my home since July 31, 2012. We have 2 boys ages 19 and 11. My 11 yo has Aspergers and a lot of anger problems. I have started dating my high school sweetheart Feb. 16 2013. We had dated for 8 years in high school and after and were even engaged, but I left him for my now ex husband. I admit I did many stupid things and was really mean when I was young and immature. I have always kept the love for my high school boyfriend, always dreaming that one day I would be back with him even if it was one of those stories you read about where you find your old true love when your 80 years old. Luckily I didn’t have to wait till then. I’m 44 and he is 46. We are exclusive and I feel that he loves me, but he hasn’t said it yet. I want to say it, but I am so afraid. I am in counseling for the domestic violence so I am trying to get rid of old habits , like building walls and other things.
His name is Sean. He has met my 11yo and doesn’t have a problem with him. My son seems to like him too. But I just need to know , is it normal for him not to say I love you? Hes a jokester and tends to not be a deep person . As for me, I send him cute pics from your site and others saying how I feel because I’m afraid to say the words. I sent him cute cards too,(its my way of expressing feelings). I know we all express love in different ways, and he does make me happy when we are together. But those times when we aren’t due adult responsibilities I start to get scared that he doesn’t care if I am with him. I know its stupid and has a lot to do with my domestic violence. .
Am I making too much of this? He has me go with him to friends and family. But he’s not as touchy feely either like he was in high school. Yes I know we are adults , but I tend to compare a lot to way back then. I think he has always had feeling for me too. Maybe I should just realize that if its not said its not the end of the world. Sometimes when I am with him I can feel the love so intensely, but would be nice to hear . And I am also afraid that because of a lot of problems I am having with my 11 yo that Sean will say screw this , I should go find someone who has no kids or at least kids that don’t have issues. I know he hasn’t and is understanding, but I am just scared.
He has been my dream for all these years and I finally have my dream come true. (no hes not perfect but its what I have wanted).